Saturday, January 11, 2014

What's been on my mind lately

Well, it's been a long time since I posted anything on here but last night when I woke up to feed Kendyl (yep we had another baby) I was looking through facebook and thoughts started racing through my mind so I turned to Heavenly Father in prayer and scanned the newly read chapters of the Book of Mormon that I had just read. Afterwards I felt like I needed to write down my feelings so that's what I'm trying to do now.

Lately it seems like there's been a lot of negative posts on facebook about the church that I belong to. Mainly those posts are from people who once were members and some from people who still are. A lot of it is due to doctrine, changes, past leaders etc... Every time I read these things my heart ached and I've kind of felt numb inside. Last night hit me a different way though and I felt prompted to both pray and read my marked scriptures.

After I finished my prayer I was reminded of the spiritual experience I had with my family as we prayed together around my fathers bed only nights before he passed away. At the time I had felt prompted to write something down about the experience but never did and I now regret that. The spirit was sooo strong and all those things I already believed about the gospel and my Heavenly Father's love for me were made known stronger as we all stood together as a family bearing our testimonies through prayer. It truly was a sacred time.

Next as I scanned the verses I had marked this past week I read from 1 Nephi Chapter 4:1-3 which reads...
"...let us be faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord; for behold he is mightier than Laban and his fifty, yea, or even than his tens of thousands? Therefore let us go up; let us be strong like unto Moses; for he truly spake unto the waters of the Red Sea and they divided hither and thither, and our fathers came through, out of captivity, on dry ground, and the armies of Pharaoh did follow and were drowned in the waters of the Red Sea. Now behold ye know that this is true; and ye also know that an angel hath spoken unto you; wherefore can ye doubt?"
What struck me this time as I read it was that I/we need to be faithful and keep the commandments. Mainly though the part that really made an impact was the last part where it talks about knowing that it's true and if I do why would I/we doubt.

I have NEVER doubted my testimony, I think that is a gift Heavenly Father has given me, to have a strong unwavering testimony. That doesn't mean I know everything or am super knowledgeable, it just means that I have faith and I believe what I have been taught. I know some people struggle with their testimonies and start to feel like they need all the answers but for me that is not the case. I feel like I know a lot but I'm also continually learning but along with that I have a testimony of the gospel and have time and time again felt the spirit tell me that the church is true. That's why my prayer last night and the particular scripture I read hit my so hard last night.

I KNOW the church is true, I have always known it. I could never deny the spirit I have felt and things I know to be true. I know that I have a loving Heavenly Father that loves me and sent down his Son, Jesus Christ to this earth to suffer for our sins and die for us that we might be resurrected one day. I know that my family can be forever and that truly is one of the greatest blessings I will receive. I know that Joseph Smith restored the church and translated the Book of Mormon and that if we read the Book of Mormon and follow it's directions we will come closer to our Heavenly Father and become more like our Saviour. I don't need to know every detail about my church's past but that doesn't mean I don't want to continue to learn and with that learning I will continue to seek the spirit and use the sacred gift I was given when I got baptised, the gift of The Holy Ghost.

I LOVE the gospel, I love my testimony and the strength it has given me and continues to give me. I know we all may have different beliefs and that is ok but when people put down the church or the people in it, it makes me sad. No one is perfect, that is why each of us are here, so we can learn and become like our Saviour. The gospel however is perfect but is led by imperfect people trying their best to lead and guide us. I know though if I put my faith in Christ, The Holy Ghost will testify to me what is true. The night we prayed with my Dad before he passed away will always be one of the most amazing spiritual experiences I have ever had. That night more than any other time I KNEW that the church was true and I knew that if I kept the commandments I would be with my Dad/family again.

I hope we can all follow the spirit and trust in the Lord. I have friends of all different faiths and I love that. I would never put someone else down for what they believe or don't believe. I just wanted to write this for myself and to testify of the things that I believe. I feel blessed to be a member of The church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and to know that I can be with my family forever as my family and the gospel are the most important things in my life. Life can be hard at times but even through those hard times I truly am blessed, I love life and I'm eternally grateful for my testimony :)

Thursday, January 19, 2012

10 year anniversary CRUISE!!!

December 2010 Steve and I celebrated our 10th anniversary, WOW!!! Time goes by sooo fast and so many things have happened since then, too many to write down. Some things have been hard but other have been AMAZING! Each have made us become better people I hope and learn lots of different things. I'm just thankful I was able to spend those 10 years with my best friend and the person I LOVE THE MOST :)

So even though our anniversary was in December we had planned to go on a cruise with our friends because their anniversaries were in April. One of ours friends couldn't go so in the end it was us and our friends the Stakers who went. We booked our tickets and arranged plans for our kids. My WONDERFUL in laws watched our kids which was SOOO nice of them. We left the end of April and were gone for about 8-9 days altogether.

When Steve and I got married our honeymoon was driving down to California to go to his sisters wedding which was only a week after our wedding. We had a fun time but half the time was spent with Steve's family. That wasn't a bad thing because we got to do lots of fun things, we went to Universal Studio's, Disney Land, the beach, it was GREAT :) We were just excited to go somewhere together on our own with no kids or obligations.

We traveled down to Las Vegas (lots of scary people there but it was fun) the first night and then the next morning we left early to get to California where we boarded the cruise ship. It was SOOO exciting :) Of course one of the first things we did was eat, hahaha!!! We had eaten a HUGE dinner the night before at Cheese Cake Factory but that was only the start to the MASS eating/feasting that we did. The cruise was NOT good for my weight, whoops ;)

I need to make a slide show of some of the pictures we took on the cruise, hopefully I can remember how because it's been a while, hahaha ;) We got to do a bunch of fun things but I won't write everything down because it would take way to long. I'll just put the pictures on and you can see for yourself :) We had an AMAZING time though and it was SOOO much fun to just spend time together and enjoy each others company for such a long time. I had never been on a cruise before, we both really liked it but if I ever went again I wouldn't eat quite as much and I think I would want to go on one that you're on land more than on the ship.

All in all we had the BEST time and we really appreciated Steve's parents watching the kids so we could have time to spend together. I truly do love my AMAZING husband Steve sooo much. He puts up with me when I'm grumpy and have no patience and that truly is a blessing to me. I can't wait for another 10 years but I think they might be a little more crazy with how big our kids are getting. I'm just thankful I get to spend those years with the best partner/husband I could ask for :)

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

A note I wrote on facebook, Nov 2011

Before I start, I know some of you already think I'm SUPER cheesy and you're right. Well, I guess it depends on what kind of cheese. I don't do well with cheesy things like the Twilight movie tonight (it was a GREAT movie, I just had to laugh at the cheesy parts), hahaha! However I am cheesy when it comes to being thankful, saying how I feel etc...

Anyway after going to the movies tonight with some friends, I just kept thinking about life and how grateful I am to have sooo many wonderful blessings. I feel like Heavenly Father really has blessed me with so many different & amazing things. Even though life can be crazy at times and people may look at my family and think we've had more than our share of trials, we've also had SOOO many blessings.

I've been blessed with a STRONG FIRM testimony and I will always be eternally grateful for that. I was raised by the MOST AMAZING parents! They are such examples to me and have and still teach me so many great things about life, the gospel, kindness, charity and the list goes on. I also feel like I've been blessed to be happy with life and myself. That may sound weird to some people but to me I feel like it's one of my GREATEST blessings. That doesn't mean I'm happy all the time or that the craziness life can bring doesn't hurt. It just means that I know it all happens for a reason and I can see beyond the silly small things and see the bigger more amazing picture. It doesn't mean I think I'm amazing or that I have all the confidence in the world. It just means I know who I am and I know I'm trying to be the kind of person my Father in Heaven wants me to be.

This may seem like a weird note but I just felt like I wanted to write it down. I know there are some people who don't always feel happy and that life can be overwhelming. Life really isn't easy, it's hard a LOT of the time. I'm just thankful that I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and who is patient with me as I make mistakes every day. I'm just thankful I know that there is ALWAYS a way to improve, there's always a way to start again, there's always a way to be the YOU you want to be. I'm thankful to have an eternal family, that I have a goal to work towards, to be with my family FOREVER!!! What a wonderful blessing and promise our Father in Heaven has given us. I think sometimes that is why I have the outlook on life that I do. I just know that if I want to be with my family again, I need to live my life the best I can.

I'm just SOOO thankful to have such a blessed life. I have a husband who loves me for ME, not because I'm a super model or the worlds best cook. I have children that love me even though I'm nuts and get mad way too fast. I have friends who put up with my craziness and forgetfulness. Sure there's things that I wish I could change in life, or bills I wish I didn't have to pay. Sure I wish I could eat all the food I wanted or I wish I could be more patient with my children. Sure I wish the trials I go through would be easier or less hurtful but I know they are all for a reason. One of my favourite quotes is, "I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it." That is SOOO true, life really is hard but all those crazy things are worth every moment I get to live with my AMAZING family, knowing that if I live my life like my Saviour would have me do, I will be with my family FOREVER!

Anyway that's enough of my woffle, hahaha! Another one my crazy traits, I'm a woffler ;)

Great Scripture

I was just reading the scriptures and I came across one I had marked previously. I feel like it really applies to me right now.

Mosiah 5:13
"For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?"

It just made me think about the changes I'm trying to make in my life. Ultimately I hope those changes will enable me to become more like my Saviour. It also made me realise that I need to be serving others WAY more than I do. I get so caught up in my own crazy life which isn't a bad thing but I need to make time to serve others and have that as something that is always in my heart.


April was a CRAZY month, it's when life got a little insane for me. We still had lots of fun though so here's a quick re-cap.
Here's my 2 handsome little men dressed for church. It doesn't that long ago that Spencer was wearing those same clothes.
Austin started his love of the counter.
Sydney turned 8 and had a bowling/monster party with her friends.
Sydney chose to be baptised and we were SOOO proud of her. She really is an AMAZING little girl who we LOVE so much :) I love her HUGE smile and how creative she is. She loves to make things ALL the time and would make crafts 24/7 if we left her. Sydney likes everything and anything. She can play dress up/make-up with girls or catch bugs with the boys. Actually catching crazy bugs is one of her favourite things to do. I would NEVER catch some of the crazy bugs she does, some if the spiders are HUGE! All in all I think Sydney is WONDERFUL and life would for sure be boring without her :)
My Mom and Dad were able to come over for Syd's baptism. We didn't think they were going to be able to come because right before they were getting ready to leave my Dad found out that his cancer had come back and was now also in his lungs. We're so thankful they were able to be here and we were able to spend time with them.
We had cake and ice cream for Syd and Rod because they share the same birthday. They shared Syd's monster cake too. She loves sharing a birthday with Rod. Whenever he's been in town he takes her for date. One time they didn't quite make it because Syd threw up on the way, whoops! This year she was getting a little sad because we had mentioned we would all tag along. She did NOT want that to happen, she wanted it to be just her, it was pretty cute/funny ;)
While Mom and Dad were here Austin started to crawl, he was pretty excited about that :)
Hadley once again fell asleep somewhere random, she's getting good at that.
We went down to Utah with Mom and Dad just before they left to go home. We had a lovely time gong around Temple Square but were VERY sad to say goodbye. We consoled ourselves on the way back by stopping off at Krispy Kreme, yummy!Spencer played soccer for the first time. He got to be on the same team as his friends Carter, Jayce and Natalie so that made it lots of fun.
Austin just kept getting cuter and cuter :)
The Easter bunny slash Nanny came to our house. Mom got the kids English Easter eggs which they thought were great! We wanted to get a picture of all the kids together but Austin was asleep. (The above picture of Austin was on the same day as this)
Steve and I were able to be in the ward Roadshow. It was tons of fun :) Steve was an angel and had to stand on stilts and wear a long white robe. Everyone cheered when he came out, it was so fun. I was a shepherd and Hadley got to be a sheep. We had to wear make-up but Steve was not about to do that. My friend put mine on and it was quite interesting. Not because of her but because we had to put a bunch on and I am NOT used to that. All in all it was FANTASTIC and our ward did a GREAT job. Not that I'm biased but I thought our Roadshow was THE BEST!!!

A quick review of last year!

MARCH in pictures
Maddie played volleyball and Sherisse and Stephanie coached.
Sydney thought she was a super hero and created LOTS of things at Grandma's house
Spencer thought he was an army guy after going to an army themed birthday party. He wore this head band for quite a while afterwards.Hadley thought she would decorate herself in my mascara, how nice of her ;) At least she got
some of it close to her eyes, right???
Austin kindly got decorated too :)

Yes, yes, I am crazy!

So along with being better with this blog I really wanted to start writing down memories about my past so my kids will have them for the future. I know it's another blog so it's adding ANOTHER thing to my list of things I want to do but I figure this is something beneficial and something that is important. Anyway, here's the address for my new blog, ENJOY!!!

Hopefully I'm REALLY back!!!

WOW!!! I've been SOOO bad at keeping my blog, it's pretty sad really. It seems as though this past year was just a little crazy and there was sooo many things going on. I always meant to catch up but never did but I REALLY want to try and start writing on here again.

This morning while I was working out with my friends we were talking about keeping journals. I used to be sooo good at it in my youth and when I first got married but since then I've been terrible. I kind of saw my blog as a journal and I was doing so well at first so it was great. Anyway along with a bunch of other goals I have, I really want to start writing on here again so I can keep a record of all the things we do as a family. My hope is to make this into a book one day. A few of my friends have done that and they're sooo nice.

Anyway, so I'm going to try REALLY hard and be a better blogger/journal keeper. I had started 2 other blogs aswell which at some point I intend to add things too and probably will throughout the year but I think keeping this blog is WAY more important. I think it's good to do other things because as a mother of 5 I need to do some things for myself but at the same time I don't want "THINGS" to overtake what I LOVE the most and that is my family :)

So, like I said, I have a bunch of goals this year but to sum them up I guess I'm just trying to be a better me. Last year was a little crazy for me. My Dad found out he had cancer again and the outlook was NOT good. The news came at a time when I had TONS of things going on and my emotions were ALL over the place. I felt like a wreck and life just seemed a little overwhelming. A lot of the time I just keep things to myself because I just think I'm ok and can deal with things on my own. I think Steve was a little shocked because I'm normally pretty tough and can cope with anything and everything. I guess I wasn't SOOO bad, I was just SUPER emotional and a bit of a mess. Anyway I went home for the summer which was FANTASTIC! It was hard seeing my Dad so sick but the time we were able to spend with him was AMAZING!!! Since then my Dad has been doing really well. He still has a lot of pain but with the special diet and medicine he takes (all natural stuff) he's been able to stop any growth so we're all thankful for that. It's still such a crazy thing though because he has some REALLY bad days and you never truly know what is going to happen. For now I'm just thankful he's alive and there is no more growth.

When I came home, back to America after being in England it was SOOO hard for me. I've never not wanted to come back here but that time I really wanted to go back home to England. It was the weirdest feeling and I felt sad for a good couple of weeks. I felt so out of place and was pretty sad all the time. It was weird because I LOVE my life here and this is where I want to be but I think because I had spent so much time at home and because of all the things going on with my Dad it just made it so much harder to not be with my family in England. After feeling sorry for myself I'm ok now, it's just hard not being there to help my family and be there with them.

Since then I've thought a lot more about life and how I want my life to be. I've ALWAYS had a STRONG testimony of the gospel and will always be eternally grateful to my parents for raising me in the church and for being such AMAZING examples to me of faith and strength. Last year our family goal was to have Family Home Evening every week and to read the scriptures and have family prayer every day. That is our goal every year it seems but this past year we did the best we've ever done. Not perfect but sooo much better. This year we're adding family prayers in the mornings too because right now we have them before bed but we really wanted to try and have them before the kids leave for school. I really want my kids to LOVE the gospel and be proud to say they are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. One of my favourite scriptures is Romans 1:16, it says "For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ..." and that truly is how I feel.

Sometimes I think I seem to get caught in the trap of thinking I'm ok, I have a testimony and think that I'm ok without doing the simple things I should be doing. I know that really is NOT the case though. Even though I have a testimony which is great, I need to be constantly be making it stronger and learning as much as I can. One thing I've been doing this year is listening to the Relief Society lesson and general conference talks while I go on my elliptical. I have LOVED it. I'm not big into reading books, ok I'm not big into reading at all, hahaha! This has been such a good way to listen to the things I want to while exercising which is another one of my goals :) My ultimate goal is to get up at 6am every day so I can have that time to exercise, read my scriptures and say my prayers. So far I haven't done great on the time but I have been waking up early enough to exercise and ready my scriptures most of the time. It's sad really that the things that are most important are the things I haven't been doing the best at. Every night I set my alarm but I'm just sooo tired, or maybe just lazy is a better word for it. I need to just tell myself to do and make sure the first thing I do is get on my knees and pray because that is the one thing I'm the worst at and that is the most important one I think.

Anyway I think I could write FOREVER, I'm quite the woffler, hahaha! More than anything I just want to RENEW ME!!! I want to be the best wife, mother, friend, daughter and sister I can be. I know it's always going to be a work in progress but I also know that if I'm always trying that is all Heavenly Father asks of me.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

I'm a blog SLACKER!!!

So, I'm a blog slacker, what can I say. I really actually LOVE keeping a blog but it seems like life has just been a little nuts lately and I have never been able to catch up. We spent most of the summer in England with my family which was GREAT. Due to that though I've been either trying to get ready for that or trying to get back into the swing of life here. Anyway I REALLY want to start blogging again on here and on both of my other blogs. The only problem is that I said I would have a booth at the kids school craft fair so now I need to get busy making lots of wood crafts. The good part about that is that I will be able to add some more things on to my craft blog, YAY :) Anyway I will catch up little by little eventually so watch this space :)

Monday, June 6, 2011

It's been a while

Well I really haven't been very good at blogging due to a few different things which include laziness, busyness, forgetfulness, life's drama and many other things. I'm not sure if anyone even follows my blog anymore or really ever did, hahaha ;) The main reason I actually started my blog was so I could keep some kind of journal and so my family and friends would be able to know what was going on with me and my crazy little family. So, I'm going to attempt to try and catch up and get better at blogging again. I guess we'll see how it goes but I am going to try and trying is what matters most, right? :)